de "The search for the self" the Heins Kohut

"Self psychology sees man as born strong, not weak, because it takes account of the fact that he is born into the psychological matrix of responsive selfobjects, just as he is born into the physiological matrix of an atmosphere that contains oxygen. To examine the baby psychologically in isolation from the selfobjects (who indeed are a part of him and of whom he is a part, from the beginning) would be just as absurd as it would be to examine it physiologically in a vacuum, i.e., without oxygen (which indeed is simultaneously 'inside' and 'outside' of him physically, as are the selfobjects simultaneously 'inside' and 'outside' of him psychologically). Being reflected by the selfobjects (mirroring), being able to merge with their calmness and power (idealization), sensing the silent presence of their essential alikeness (twinship), the baby is strong, healthy, and vigorous."